the vacuum cleaner edfringe

Tim Vine has become the first comedian to be awarded the "funniest joke" at the Edinburgh Fringe twice, with a one-line quip about a vacuum cleaner. His joke, picked from more than 7,000 comic offerings, went: "I've decided to sell my Hoover... well, it was just collecting dust." The quip, short listed by a panel of experts and voted for by the public, has now triumphed over more than 3,000 shows at the Fringe, as prize organisers hailed him the "king of one-liners". It is the second time he has won the sought-after prize, following his 2010 offering: "I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again." The award, organised by television channel Dave, marks the finest one-liners on the Edinburgh Festival Fringe each year. This year is the largest festival in its history, with nearly 50,000 performances of 3,193 separate shows across 299 venues in the city; an 11 per cent rise since 2013. The size of the festival, which also has an increased number of female comedians, has meant the toughest year yet for the Dave's Funniest Joke of The Fringe Award.
The one-liner awarded second place, by Masai Graham, went: "I've written a joke about a fat badger, but I couldn't fit it into my set." In third place, comedian Mark Watson joked: "Always leave them wanting more, my uncle used to say to me. Which is why he lost his job in disaster relief." Dave has now compiled a list of the top ten jokes at this year's Fringe, as well as naming and shaming the worst in an accompanying "top flops" rundown. Vine, who is appearing in show Tim Timinee Tim Timinee Tim Tim To You at the Pleasance Courtyard, said of his win: "I'm a little bit surprised but very delighted." In a humorous dig aimed at the television channel's frequent repeats of Britain's favourite comedies, he added: "This is the second time I've won this award but I guess nobody loves a repeat more than Dave." Steve North, general manager of Dave, added: "It's great to see a range of established and new comedians in this year's top 10. "The award celebrates the fantastic range of comedy on offer at the Fringe, and Tim has once again proved he is king of the one-liners."
The top ten includes three jokes entered by female comedians; the joint-highest number since three women also appeared in 2008. Last year, no jokes from women were selected. In fourth place, Bec Hill said: "I was given some Sudoku toilet paper. You could only fill it in with number 1s and number 2s." electrolux ergorapido vacuum cleaner zb2932 reviewsThe one-liner was followed in fifth place by Ria Lina, who told her audience: "I wanted to do a show about feminism. volta bagless vacuum cleaner u4015fBut my husband wouldn't let me." kleenway vacuum cleanerThis year's list as compiled by a panel of judges who are estimated to have seen 60 shows, 3,600 minutes of material and 7,200 jokes each.
The experts, including reviewers and critics from national newspaper and the trade press, each selected three "best" and three "worst" jokes, for 2,000 members of the public to vote for. Vine also qualified for the "worst" list, with his show opener: "I'd like to start with the chimney jokes - I've got a stack of them. The first one is on the house." He was joined by John Kearns, who joked "I had a friend call Iain. Two 'i's... to go with the face", and Mike Shephard, for: "I'm lazy - my childhood ambition was to be an injured footballer." The 10 funniest jokes from the Fringe Festival 2014 1. "I've decided to sell my Hoover ... well, it was just collecting dust" - Tim Vine. 2. "I've written a joke about a fat badger, but I couldn't fit it into my set" - Masai Graham. 3. "Always leave them wanting more, my uncle used to say to me. Which is why he lost his job in disaster relief" - Mark Watson. 4. "I was given some Sudoku toilet paper. You could only fill it in with number 1s and number 2s" - Bec Hill.
5. "I wanted to do a show about feminism. But my husband wouldn't let me" - Ria Lina. 6. "Money can't buy you happiness? Well, check this out, I bought myself a Happy Meal" - Paul F Taylor. 7. "Scotland had oil, but it's running out thanks to all that deep frying" - Scott Capurro. "I forgot my inflatable Michael Gove, which is a shame 'cause halfway through he disappears up his own a***hole" - Kevin Day. "I've been married for 10 years, I haven't made a decision for seven" - Jason Cook. 10. "This show is about perception and perspective. But it depends how you look at it" - Felicity Ward. Honourable mentions • "I go to the kebab shop so much that when they call me boss in there it's less a term of affection, more an economic reality" - Ed Gamble. • "Leadership looks fun, but it's stressful. Just look at someone leading a conga" - James Acaster. • "I bought myself some glasses. My observational comedy improved" - Sara Pascoe. - Another classic Tim Vine one-liner plus 99 other funny jokes
A joke by comedian Tim Vine about a vacuum cleaner has been voted the funniest at this year's Edinburgh Fringe Festival.He won with the one-liner: "I decided to sell my Hoover... well it was just collecting dust."Vine, 47, saw his joke scoop almost a fifth of the votes in the competition run by comedy television channel, Dave.It is the first time the award has been presented to a previous winner.Vine also won in 2010 with the joke: "I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again." He was runner up in 2011, 2012 and 2013.On being crowned this year's winner, Vine said: "I'm a little bit surprised but very delighted. This is the second time I've won this award but I guess nobody loves a repeat more than Dave."In an interview on BBC Radio 4's Today programme, the comedian talked about the process of writing one-liners.He said: "When I think of what I think is a good joke I do often laugh, because of course it's the first time I've heard it. So I will chuckle."
But I've been wrong many times and I'll go in front of an audience thinking this is an absolute work of genius and they stare back at me going 'Sorry you want us to laugh at this point, do you?' and I realise that doesn't work at all."But it also works the other way and that's the exciting thing about writing comedy - you never quite know until you try it with an audience. Never test it on family and friends."When asked if he ever stretched his jokes to a paragraph he said: "Only on this show would I be asked that question. It's a beautiful question 'do you ever do paragraphs?' "I do occasionally, but what happens is I think that bit can go, and I don't really need that bit, and then eventually it's back to a line and a half again."Some of the finalists for funniest joke of the Fringe Festival 2014Steve North, general manager of Dave, said: "It's great to see a range of established and new comedians in this year's top 10."The award celebrates the fantastic range of comedy on offer at the Fringe, and Tim has once again proved he is king of the one-liners."